The Secret to Success in Marriage, Values & $800M Wealth | Real, Raw & Real Estate

2. Marriage, Faith & Real Estate: How to Grow Together in Business Without Growing Apart

• Tenisha & Darrell Williams

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What’s the secret to scaling together instead of growing apart? In this episode, Darrell & Tenisha Williams reveal how they learned to align as partners in life and business while running one of Florida’s top-performing brokerages.

🎧 You’ll discover:

  • Why growing separately is the most dangerous mistake for couples
  • The practices that turned conflict into collaboration
  • How defined roles fuel both love and business success
  • Why exposure to new environments expands vision

If you’re building with your spouse, leading with faith, or striving for emotional mastery, this episode shows how growth done together leads to real impact.

Join us each week as we explore how real breakthroughs happen when life and business get real. Subscribe now and join our growing movement of authentic entrepreneurs.

Prefer to watch us on video? Catch us on YouTube and Subscribe.  https://youtu.be/Jfg2GRnS1Ok?si=kWboweXKexcCmrvN

🎙️ About Real, Raw & Real Estate
Hosted by Darrell & Tenisha Williams, founders of Elite Realty Partners ($800M+ sold), this podcast goes beyond real estate. It’s about marriage, faith, business, and building generational wealth. Every Sunday we share the unfiltered conversations that help entrepreneurs, couples, and leaders grow in life and business.

📌 What You’ll Get Here

  • Lessons on faith, family, marriage, and legacy
  • Real estate + business strategies for entrepreneurs
  • Insights on building wealth with purpose
  • The raw truth about scaling as a couple

📌 Prefer video? Watch full episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@RealRawRealEstate

📌 Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/realrawandrealestate/

📌 Follow, subscribe & share to help more couples and entrepreneurs grow with us.

Speaker 1:

I'm just trying to be intentional with being a good man of God.

Speaker 2:

Because I know I can trust you with it. It's really only been three times in my life where it's like it was clear like that.

Speaker 1:

I clearly the cadence and you move, I move your right foot, my left foot, and we move together, and it's important to have the same vision.

Speaker 2:

With a business. Once you really get the rhythm, it's like the sky is the limit.

Speaker 1:

You start to realize that people need to hear this.

Speaker 2:

And now we can make magic.

Speaker 1:

We were making magic. Listen, that's yeah. Yeah, these things are working. I think we got a good rhythm in our business 100%.

Speaker 2:

So how many years did it take?

Speaker 1:

Oh, it took all of those years.

Speaker 2:

Listen how many business 100. So how many years did it take? Oh, it took all. It took all of those years. Listen how many. I mean we're on year six with elite realty partners and we're on year what with the real estate investment oh, I was just thinking that it was.

Speaker 1:

It's been four years this year. Next month, june will be four years. Okay, june will be four years, and here's the million dollar thing.

Speaker 2:

I wasn't involved in the real estate investments at all. That was my baby Until the last probably, what six months yeah?

Speaker 1:

because I got one and I said I wanted you to design it, I wanted you to put that, I want you to put that on there. Put that, Tanisha, on there. Let me see that thing. Ooh, you snapped on the tool. Baby, give me some.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, listen you snapped on that one. Yeah, so that's how I was talking to you. I mean, I have a little. I'm not a. I'm not an interior designer at all.

Speaker 1:

No, no, no, no. Don't downplay what that listen. You did that. I'm giving you your flowers right here, right now. I ain't talking crap. You did that.

Speaker 2:

Right, so that's where I came in. Only just about six.

Speaker 1:

You ready for another one?

Speaker 2:

What? No, I don't like that part. I don't like and that's. And that's another thing about you know being in partnership. You know in business with your partner just knowing, hey, don't do what you don't like. You know, focus on your strengths. Focus on your stress is important because for me I can't deal with contractors. I don't want to go to jail or hell. So I I just I don't have the the patience that it takes to deal with contractors. Okay, listen, there have been some times where when I get involved then it just yeah.

Speaker 1:

So yeah, I know I don't know, listen I. I say I ain't gonna say that on camera, never mind so moving on.

Speaker 2:

Moving on, moving on is knowing okay, these are the roles, let's stay there. This is where you shine and this is your strength, right? Because I know, I remember I used to get frustrated and I'm like I know you know how to do this part. Why can't you do this part when, in actuality, that's not the part you like to do? So let let you focus on what you like to do.

Speaker 1:

Let me focus on what I like to do, and now you know we do something amazing together yeah, because the truth is, what you do is valuable for me, just like what I do is valuable for you, and it's all for one greater goal. It's all for one cause it's to bring our, bring our goals to life.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so I think that's important, and not only that. I feel like we made a vow to each other. Let's talk about this. We made a vow to each other recently to where in business, when we tell each other a strong suggestion a strong suggestion. Yes personal and business. Really the other person must listen.

Speaker 1:

Pay attention.

Speaker 2:

Because I think oftentimes we take for granted that our partner has sound advice. You know, it's hard to read the label from the inside. It's hard, it's hard, it's hard to read the label from the inside so I think, since we made that decision, to where now we can remind each other and say hey, I'm just telling you, I mean as recently as last night, right? So? Last night in the, in the car, daryl, when I was telling you my opinion oh yeah, you were jesus.

Speaker 1:

You was strong suggestions last night. She was so strong suggestion like we had a strong conversation last night I had but sometimes you're having your strong conversations and your strong suggestions, right.

Speaker 2:

But I just know that if I would have listened to you in many situations where, in business, you know certain mistakes wouldn't have happened, certain blowups wouldn't have happened, you know certain losses wouldn't have happened, and then vice versa, if you would have listened to me you know, for you know many years certain things in business.

Speaker 2:

So I just feel, I just want the people to know, and I really want to tell you that I'm just glad that we are at a place in business where we've identified the roles that make sense for us and now it's like the sky is the limit now, you like me some more, you like me even more now I do, you know, because I was telling.

Speaker 2:

I was telling as a matter of fact, I was um telling a friend the other day. I'm like I don't know who this daryl is. You know, I don't know this. Golly, personally developed patient, still a little crazy sometimes, definitely a little crazy sometimes, but the the patience is there. You know, you being receptive to certain things is is far more now than ever before. So I just think that you know, often in marriage you know how a husband or a wife may say, oh, the wife changed, she's not the same, or the husband changed and he's not the same, and really you're not supposed to stay the same. I always tell that. You know how. I always tell the agents the most dangerous thing that you could do is personally develop or grow without your spouse, without your spouse, because you're going to outgrow them and now the conversation is just not the same, right. So I feel like the fact that we decided to grow together.

Speaker 2:

We decided Personally and in business, the fact that we decide to listen to the right podcast or the right audio books, you know, or go to the right conferences. We go to the conferences together, we're taking notes together, we're planning after the conference on how we're going to execute together, and so many times, husband and wives in business is so much, so many things that are separate correct separate bank accounts, separate mindsets, separate everything, when in actuality you're supposed to be one, and I think that I'm just glad that we figured it out.

Speaker 2:

It's still not easy, but it's.

Speaker 1:

But it's a whole lot easier than it used to be, it ain't perfect and it ain't supposed to be perfect, and I'm glad it ain't perfect. I can't do this cookie cutter this. Let's have our fun, let's experience it together, man, to just make it. It just make it so much better for me.

Speaker 2:

You know what I mean yeah, closing the day oh yeah, closing the day, oh yeah, the investment tight.

Speaker 1:

Listen what listen? Check your phone, see if they can see 30 more minutes okay, cool, 30 minutes, 30 minutes.

Speaker 2:

I don't know which number this is, but I'll tell you, even in this situation, with the one we're closing on today, we're able to help somebody yeah, and it's always about, for me, helping somebody when you have investors that are sharks, you know, and they're just about the money that's real we've.

Speaker 2:

We take losses often, you know, because it's not just about making money on a flip or making money on a long term rental. It's more so about making sure that even the person that may have lost the house or losing the house, they're still in a good situation.

Speaker 1:

Absolutely, absolutely. So, yeah, I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful for what God has allowed us to experience and be a blessing to those who need it. So, no man, listen, this is. It's different this time. It feels different this time and it's it feel good. I'm ready, I'm ready to do some more. I'm definitely ready to do some more and I'm glad I'm doing it with you.

Speaker 2:

It's bigger than real estate.

Speaker 1:

Definitely deeper than real estate. Talk about mindset, the mindset that's needed in order to get from point A to point B, whatever point B may be. There's a couple of things that come to mind. Well, I'll start by something that you used to say. As a matter of fact, you telling people about the importance of exposure, expansion and exposure yeah why is that so important?

Speaker 1:

because and I'm I'm gonna touch on that because when you met me, it was it was carol city. We're gonna buy us a house in carol city. We're gonna live in was carrot city. We're gonna buy us a house in carrot city. We're gonna live in carrot city.

Speaker 1:

We're gonna have us a house across the county line that's all it was and, and, honestly, because that's that's really all I knew, granted, we lived, I don't know what, maybe a mile and a half I think I need to tell you didn't want to cross the county line I didn't want to come, I didn't want cross the county line and it was a mile and a half away. But it just goes to show you how much I was really exposed to, or what I was open to being exposed to, I should say, if that makes sense.

Speaker 2:

Mindset shifts are so important. But, to be honest with you, mindset shifts also make me feel bad sometimes, because I know that in order for you to have a mindset shift, it is directly based on your exposure. That's one thing you know. That I say all the time to agents is that the power of being exposed. You can't put a price tag on it. Some people live and die without being exposed. Right, and I think about it. You know what if I wasn't exposed to real estate? You know when I met you? What if you weren't exposed to a higher quality of life? You know when you met me, where it's like. You met me when I was living in a poverty stricken apartment complex too. Right, but it was something about my mindset because I was exposed.

Speaker 2:

My mom, when we were growing up, regardless of the dysfunction and the ups and downs happy times, down times she always exposed us to a certain quality of life. I remember being a teenager and she exposed me to a woman at the church and they lived in a huge house. Imagine the seed that's planted when you're a child and you see now that, hey, this is possible. I'm going to somebody's house every day that looks like a house that's on TV. I don't know.

Speaker 2:

I didn't know then that that was a seed that was planted Right. But now my, our home is bigger than that home, right, but the seed was planted back from a teenager. So those mindset shifts are so important. But thank God for social media, to where some people look at social media as a bad thing. But it is allowing the masses to be exposed, which then in turn allows you to have a mindset shift and then go in a direction that you would probably would have never even went in before shift and then go in a direction that you would probably would have never even went in before.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, very true, very true. Look, social media can be a gift and a curse, but again, mindset is really everything. It's really everything because just because you see those things and you see people that very well may look like you doesn't mean you're gonna automatically get it. What's the saying? You don't expect? Don't expect to reap the rewards for the work that you didn't put in Meaning. How do you expect that you're going to have this, the person that has that and the people that have those things? This is what they did. Not only that, they probably did that every day for a very long time.

Speaker 2:

So my question to you is like, even with us, right Right, it was difficult to get you to see past county line.

Speaker 1:

True.

Speaker 2:

It was difficult to get you to want more than what you felt like your level of success was at the time, because guess what? For your age, age and everything, you were super successful. But now we realize guess what, even being rich or be, or even being wealthy, you can have a rich person that then starts talking to somebody that owns a yacht and now you're no longer right you're the level of wealth is based on what what you're exposed to somebody.

Speaker 2:

People may think that we're rich. People may think that we're wealthy when we think that we're nowhere near where we want to be so exposed to so much more so my question is because I was hitting a brick wall for a long time true with wanting to even move past county line, or then wanting to move past, you know, the next home, or wanting to want certain things. What was your mindset shift where you went from a place of a scarcity mindset to an abundance mindset?

Speaker 1:

honestly, it's just. It's just me being a man. I wasn't comfortable there.

Speaker 2:

I wasn't comfortable there.

Speaker 1:

I wasn't comfortable there. So, granted, now we get older, we get wiser, we get exposed to more, and then you realize, man, I could do that, I could do that. Okay, it looks like this. What does that look like? I'm already willing to sacrifice, I'm already. This is already my responsibility, this is already my responsibility. I can do that, I can swing that. I'm willing to do what I need to do for us to have this. And I just you had to be. I had to humble myself a little bit. I'm not going to lie to you. I definitely had to humble myself, because I knew I would have been good where I was at. I would have been good where I was at, but there was but.

Speaker 2:

Wow, I just thought about something. So then, that I'm glad that you say that. So, as a man, because you you've been a provider since I met you and I'm just now realizing right now that you feel you felt like you needed to be comfortable there I remember when I wanted to quit corrections Remember, I wanted to quit, I only wanted to do real estate and I had to wait you know to say yes, you could quit right, and I didn't understand that until right now yeah, I had to make sure listen, I was.

Speaker 1:

I had to read, I had to rebuild some things, I had to get back to where I had to get. I had to get a good rhythm on on what I was working on. But once I get a good rhythm, I can't't speak for everybody, but for me, if I got it, I got it, you ain't got to worry about it.

Speaker 2:

So I appreciate that because guess what? When I did quit real estate and I mean quick corrections I didn't sell a house for four or five months, not knowing that that was going to happen. But now I know as a man you wanted to feel like, whatever you had saved or whatever you was doing, that you would still make sure the house is good. And thank god because we never do.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, we never miss. We're not gonna miss me as a man. I'm gonna make sure we we're not gonna miss. That's my responsibility. Worry about what you need to worry about. I'm gonna worry about what I need to worry about on this. Granted, what I'm worried about is bringing this in and putting this on the table so that everybody is taken care of. You do what you need to do. I do what I need to do. We're going to bring it all to the park.

Speaker 2:

And when it comes to mindset shifts for me, I think that I'll never forget being exposed to personal development. You remember man being exposed?

Speaker 1:

to personal development. You remember, man, I remember those car rides.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that was a mindset shift when I first started real estate. Yeah, and your cousin-in-law, well, my cousin-in-law, our cousin-in-law, dre, introduced. Shout out, dre, definitely shout out. Introduce me to jim rohn, and I never heard the term personal development saying yeah we didn't know.

Speaker 2:

We didn't even know what that was just going through the motions going through the motions and it just so happened to be around the same time that I started real estate. And when I tell you, if you remember, like I was committed to changing my whole life for real estate, I stopped watching tv. Still don't watch tv?

Speaker 1:

yes, true, however many years that's been at that time I stopped listening to the housewives? It was the housewives, darren. You won't believe what so or so huh no, it was also, uh, the haves and have nots boy Tyler Perry was on in my house that was my, it was going down but, it was going down but when I got introduced in Jim Rohn, it's like I became addicted to personal development like that was a serious mindset shift for me crazy part is that's an ongoing thing to this day.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

You know what I mean. I got a lot of it. I respect the heck out of you for like to be that committed to personal development, but knowing that you must be personally developed, especially dealing with all of these different personalities, with these people that we're coming in contact with in real estate or in business period Just being just being a leader. If you really want to be a good leader, if you really want to be a good leader, you need to be working on your personal development. You need to know who you are so you can show up as your best self to help somebody else out. You can't be out there. They can't pour from an empty cup.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I feel like when I was so committed to personal development, it was before I even knew what it was for, like I wasn't doing it for anybody else, right? I wasn't personally developing to be a leader, I was personally developing to be a better me, right? You know, because a lot of times we need to unlearn some things, oh there it is.

Speaker 1:

We need to unlearn some things. Oh, it is.

Speaker 2:

We need to unlearn some behavior.

Speaker 1:

You got to sit up and sit a little bit because you have to unlearn you. You got to talk. Listen, let's touch on that, touch on unlearning some things.

Speaker 2:

Mindset shift, being honest with yourself, because oftentimes we're in an environment where we don't realize that we're being taught to be, to have a quick temper. You know, we're being taught to not communicate. We're being taught let's talk about it Even in black families and your own, something that we've been talking about lately brushing everything under the rug, not having real conversations, and families that then turn into not knowing how to have real conversations in business. Right Like you have to have real conversations in business. Right Like you have to have a mindset shift. We just recently went through something where, just because somebody didn't know how to have a hard conversation, you know, a 20 plus year friendship is ended, you know, based on just a whole lot of stuff that didn't have to happen. So I just feel like it's important to have several mindset shifts, several mindset shifts as you go on life's journey and in business.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you're supposed to be getting wiser as you age. It's a lot of people just getting older.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

So no, absolutely.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you could get older or you could grow older and and at this point I want to whatever's not growing is dying, true, and I want to continuously have a mindset shift because on the on the flip side of that, what have I been saying lately, where I feel like I became too addicted to personal development and didn't realize that some things needed to stay, stay, some things were deeply rooted because god made me unique in those areas. That's why, look, there's good bacteria, just like there's bad bacteria.

Speaker 1:

So I got so focused on totally unlearning everything but some things, yes, make me who I am yeah, some things you got in your bones, some things you got in your bones and they're supposed to be there yeah there's a listen, no matter, it could be stripped away of everything, but who are you? Or to the, who are you to your core? Now, as long as that's something that's good and positive, I think that's something that you might want to hold on to.

Speaker 2:

You don't want to unlearn everything so let me ask you on business right, because as a wife I have had the privilege of not only seeing you have a mindset shifting.

Speaker 1:

You see how you know I'm gonna just let me stop you right now. You see how you always position when you talk to me like like, stop playing with me. Yeah, you see, you get the privilege, the honor and the privilege to work with me alongside you, me as as my wife.

Speaker 2:

God it is a privilege listen talk to me guys it's a privilege right yeah, because to be honest, there are a lot of women who desire to be married and am I like?

Speaker 2:

I have a faithful husband? True, I have an honest husband. I have a providing husband. I have a husband that's a great father. You're not perfect. Do you drive me crazy? Absolutely, but one thing that we have been able to establish over the years is, right now, like having a number of different mindset shifts. We don't look at nothing like how we used to look at it, probably not even three months ago I agree, I agree like we are continuously having mindset shifts based on what we're exposing ourselves to and we're doing it together.

Speaker 1:

It all goes back to what you, what you mentioned earlier. We're on this personal development journey together yeah so yeah, I don't know and and not and.

Speaker 2:

Now, thank god.

Speaker 1:

It's not just a personal development journey, it's a spiritual development I'm guessing, faith center, faith center, pastor turman the turman's uh shout out to uh, um, uh, bishop fernandez, listen, I appreciate y'all. I appreciate y'all. I appreciate y'all. I'm glad we found y'all, I'm glad we joined. I'm locked in.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so the faith center I have witnessed has truly been a mindset shift for you. Oh yeah, oh yeah. We have visited countless churches. We've both grown up in the church different denominations, up in the church, different denominations but in just the past eight months, like walk us through that mindset shift I have.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I grew up in the church, church of God in Christ, since a little boy. I got saved as a little boy, I don't think. I just recently told my, told my mama this I told you that I got saved because I was scared to die. I got scared. I got saved when I was like 13. I was just afraid.

Speaker 1:

I was having dreams and visions and all the other stuff that, for whatever reason, I thought I was gonna die as a young boy and I and and I told I was told that if you died and you wasn't saved, you're going to hell. So I'm like shoot, I don't want to go to hell. Y'all talking about hell like it's hot down there, it's fire. I don't want to be there. I've seen the movies. I don't want to go there. So I got saved then. But then as I got older, they started getting how they say that church, you start experiencing certain things in the church and blah blah. But as I got older, wiser, and started getting some life experience and becoming a man and raising my kids, I that's why we look, that's why we searched so long to find a church home and that we could actually, that I felt comfortable bringing my kids in Six years.

Speaker 1:

It took a, it took a listen. We visited a lot. We visited a lot of churches and this particular church I just connected and just so happened Pastor Tubman was coming in while we was looking for that church and we'll tell that story how we will was coming in while we was looking for that church and want to tell that story how we were.

Speaker 2:

Well, let me, let me, let me so intentional. Let me, let me finish.

Speaker 1:

Let me finish that part, that's fine I wanted to be intentional with this walk that I'm on with god, and not just, of course, for me, but for my kids but where did it come from that?

Speaker 2:

what? Okay, well, I guess the face for me.

Speaker 1:

I know, I know the, I know the power of, I know the power of god, like I know the importance of, I know the power just to name jesus but we already knew the power, what no, it's special this time seeing a man boldly, proudly praising god.

Speaker 1:

A manly man pastor tucker pastor tucker, a manly man, a godly man, man, that ain't that ain't shame he. He ain't hot, he ain't ducking or hiding or faking. He's screaming, shouting god, definitely ain't twisting man. I ain't gonna be able to do it, but I wouldn't be able to do it. No, but a manly man being a real good man of God or being, from what I can tell, being the example that I really needed to see early on, or what a, what a true man of God is. So for me, seeing that and knowing I need to be there for my family, for my kids, I'm like, I'm listening, I'm connected and the story goes how. We even decided to go to this church.

Speaker 2:

Go ahead, I'll let you tell that story on that, though, because I think that that's really what South Florida is missing. You know, in a church like a pastor, like Pastor Tutman, I'm sorry, like we were missing that. We were looking for six years where I liked certain churches, but we couldn't choose that church because you didn't like the church. If you shook the pastor's hand and it wasn't strong enough for you, that might've been a little that might've been a little much, but that's just what I.

Speaker 1:

That's just how I am, though you know what I mean.

Speaker 2:

No, but my point is a manly man was led by a manly man, right?

Speaker 2:

So look what you're saying Like that's so freeing. It's the first time I'm hearing it where it was the way you could see a manly man be faithful, say in front of the whole church hey, I'm not, I'm never going to embarrass you, bishop. Praise. The Lord is still masculine and he's showing the world what a godly man can still look like, who still works out, you know, who still is dominant, you know and who's telling the truth in and out of the pulpit. From from what we know, he's doing a great job. True, so that was a real mindset shift, because you're not telling the people this, but then you get baptized and then it's like you're just I don't, this is a dude from carol city intentional though it's, it's intentional.

Speaker 1:

I I need. I was missing that. I don't want to. I don't care about what people may look at and see or maybe consider to be success. I was lacking. I was lacking, I listen. I'm glad I'm connected right now. Again, I ain't perfect, I ain't trying to be perfect, but I'm intentional with what I'm doing and what I'm exposing my family to. Nobody's gonna pray for my family more than I'm gonna pray for my family. Nobody gonna. It's not this, not this. Go around this whole walk is different, the talk different.

Speaker 2:

I'm still there from care of city, but I'm at a different place right now mindset mindset show spiritual, it's every if I'm different and I, and I think that everything happened so fast, you know, in the sense of to go like, from going to the faith center to you getting baptized and now being involved in a men ministry, men's ministry, being surrounded by men, this pouring, so you're not the only one pouring, being surrounded by other men, that's faithful, honest, hardworking, successful. I feel like God, just God, just align. So much this year for you, so you had to take a loss, but then you gained. So much this year for you, so you had to take a loss, but then you gained so much so much, yeah, yeah, yeah, there's god session god answers prayers.

Speaker 1:

That's the reality. Yeah, that's his prayer and god. He removed things or people out of your life for a reason, so I'm not gonna keep talking about. I won't keep talking about what I lost. I'm just so happy that I'm gaining and moving in a positive direction.

Speaker 2:

And if we're really being raw. Um, when people talk about you know being led by your husband, you know, even spiritually, like the old Daryl I, I didn't really imagine that. You know what I mean. That's not, that wasn't your personality, so I couldn't. I couldn't imagine being led by you spiritually. I can imagine being led, you know, financially, personally, everything, but I couldn't imagine that. And now here I am, living it. I'm living being led by you spiritually, like you're. You're, you're praying more than me. You're going to church when I'm not going to church, you know, and you're not pretending to be anything more than what you are and how God made you. And I just think that that's so good for young men to see that you don't have to change who you are, you don't have to be prim and proper. You can have a mindset shift Right, while still authentically being you as a man. Yeah, so yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, mindset. Mindset shift, it's time to go up y'all.

Speaker 2:

It's bigger than real estate.

Speaker 1:

Definitely bigger than real estate, definitely bigger than real estate new episode every single week. Subscribe now on apple, spotify or wherever you get your podcasts and visit us at real run realestatecom to join the movement, because when life and business gets real, that's when the breakthrough happens.

Speaker 2:

And there is research that shows that most successful people have some form of faith in their foundation.

Speaker 1:

Raising a kid while being a kid is confusing.

Speaker 2:

Yes, love everyone, but that does not mean that everybody gets access.